So it has been awhile...

It is currently 00:30 over where i live and i just remembered that i havent been on here for so long. i know there will be no one to read this but this is what i do when im bored and plus it's one thing i can do to express my feelings and thoughts. I have been in School my whole life. im in AJROTC, and boy aint that class fun. lol im in the color guard, if your on my facebook you will see it too. High school is a drag. like really? why is there still drama? we aint in middle school anymore, we are also considered as adults but ppl these days act so immature. well i am not them so i cant blame them. im technically a sophomore but i could have been a junior if i wanted too, back then. i had that option but i didnt take that chance because it was too much work. im lazy but when i want to do something i will get the job done. that is why every single friend of mine that knows me can trust me because i will do it fully. and i am not scared to admit if i couldnt do it. i feel like i have been losing friends this school year. one of them complains that she is "growing up" but if you knew her from middle school, no matter how "grown up" you are it is just different. a different person to be more exact. but *sigh* oh well. i miss my old laptop, because i cant buy the games i wanna play on pc because i dont play games like other ppl. game stations? i go hard with the WASD keys. i wanted to play assassin's creed revelations again. i miss the assassin's creed series...but i dont have my good laptop so i cant play it with the laptop im using now. im lucky enough to play starcraft on here. *sigh* why did i forget about it in NY? I start my winter break today...well im cutting this off but i hope who ever is reading this, i hope you have a safe and happy holiday break, PEACE

Olive you by Dave days ft Kimmi Smiles(cover)

so i made a cover of this song, if your reading this, tell me what you guys think

Can't get the feelings out of my mind
These words that everyone talks about
The things you do like, act so cool oool
I wanna let you know how i feel but i couldnt sooo

Olive you and everything you do
What two words can mean afraid to say the other three
Olive you the words are coming true
I don't know what to say but olive you

Can't struggle the thoughts i feel deep inside
I try to say it to you but i always deny
The way you talk like, the things you do like
Here right by my side, like no other lie

Olive you and the little things you do
What two words can mean afraid to say the other three
Olive you the words are coming true
I don't know what to say but olive you

You always wanna tell me but i never notice
I'll let them out what's been on my mind
Those two words need an I love...

I love you and everything you do
These two words can mean the same as those three
I love you never felt so cool
All I can say is I love you

(Olive you olive you olive you)
I love you
(Olive you olive you olive you)
I love you
(Olive you olive you olive you)
I love you
(Olive you olive you olive you)
I love you

first song Cookie Ninja Ever wrote

I love the way you kiss,
Love the way, you, I miss
Love the way joke around,
Even though the pictures we took
are still on the ground.
Chorus........................
Baby lets not forget,
Definitely not regret,
Let’s live it to the last
Just forget about the past
I’ll kiss you,
And you’ll kiss me,
Together forever baby,
It’s just you and me.
-----------------------------
I wanna be with you,
Till the very end,
Boyfriend, best friend,
Whatever, I still want you to be with me
We’ll be that old couple
Everybody’ll wish they’ll be
When we’re old, we’ll still be causing trouble
Baby, just never leave me

Chorus!!
Baby we’re great,
It must have been fate,
Don’t forget
And never regret
Our love...

Chorus!!!

Don’t worry about us, baby,
It’s just you and me
Us together,
Probably forever.

Cookie Ninja this is 4 you

thank you sis
for being there for me
you mean alot
even though we havent met
but i promise i will bet

that one day,
i will come and play
with you on that same day
i pray i will come to
Buffalo, Minnesota
to visit the person i care
the most, her name?

well, her name is cookie ninja.
yes its true,
her name is cookie ninja.
dont get jealous of my ninja sis

she is my love, my life, my everything
she means the world to me
she is there for me
whenever i need someone to
talk or fight with me.
if not, party with me.

i used to feel alone
but that feelin is agone
thanks to her and kt
which makes me feel O.P.

I know you're there for me,
you are my best friend
and yet we havent met
but we both know
one day we will meet
and till then,
i will always say
I LOVE YOU!
over the internet

Ninja Bubbles, This Is for You

The awesome person I know you are,
That's you and no body else,
You may be sad,
I know how that is,
I'm sad too.
You're not clingy.
You just need someone to depend on,
someone who's there.

Well, look in the mirror,
& There's someone who's there.
Look at Kt, she's there too.
Come to minnesota,
Drive to buffalo,
and meet me.
I'm here for you too.

I know how you feel,
stupid and weak,
wrong and different,
you don't belong.

You belong in my world,
Ninja bubbles,
You're my brother,
You're my life.
You mean so much,
I don't know what I'd do without you.
Me and You Understand.
The pain,
The hurt,
and the loneliness.
You're never alone,
and never would be.
You have people who love you,
Just like me.

A poem made for me by my sister, Chey :)

boring first day of summer

so today was the first day of summer. it didnt went well at all. i'm waiting for my call for working at a chinese restaurant...but yea. i was so bored today that i took my bike and went everywhere in wilmington. lol, i went downtown, then to the mall. then harris teeter, and then back home. haha i was so bored. well this summer i just hope im able to go to some of my friend's house. this may be my last year here and i want it to be a while. i would want to go to... cheryl's, jordan's, joseph's, idk who else...thats all thats in my head right now. wait...maybe hunter too.
i just want most of my summer time to be with my friends...thats all im asking...i know i have to babysit my sis and dad. but come on know...dad, you dont have friends here, which doesnt apply to me. sis has every technology i have. she is doing way better then when i was a child. im a sophomore, i have friends since a long time ago. if i cant go to at least the first two ppl's house...well i will be pissed... well hope summer goes out as planned.

Lost Love

Void, empty, hollow inside
My dreams have fled, my hopes have died
Existence has no reason
Life's just passing with each season

She was my life, my hope, my love
All is gone, passed by thereof
The hurt is such no one should bear
What's to life, why should I care?

I weep all night for my love gone
My heart is sick, for death I long
My eyes have tears for love that's lost
I'll mourn always for the great cost

But in each day Lord give me hope
Strengthen me so I may cope
Grant me wisdom to help me see
The great way and not just me.

There is this One Girl

So, there is this one girl i met and she was cute and hot. Her name is ____________. We met in homeroom but also through her boyfriend back then. He was my bro back then...always having my back. Now i have no idea where he is or what he's doing. Well first i was shy around her and i dont know about her. Then one day in my Tech Class we were outside having our "free-time" or should i say our "education." But we were playing Basketball and she came over and played with me...just me and her. I was happy. And while we were playing, i notice that she was more beautiful then when i see her from a distance. i cant lie because its true. Then after she broke up with her boyfriend...i waited for a while...thought about asking her out, but i was still shy...like really really shy. so, it turns out i didnt ask her out. But for some reason, one day, she asked me out and i was thinking, "i must be having a dream." So when i got home from school. and still have the note she gave me...and then said to myself, " nope not a dream," and how can i not accepted? the girl i like asked me out! So we went out like for Half a semester, but then we broke up...why? i have no idea...well i sorta dont remember it. because it was like lets see........3 years ago? so yea...then in our last year in middle school...she asked me out again in 8th well, technically she was like, "you ARE going out with me." so yea, again we went out again...lol
Now time has pass, we broke up again and when we went to HS. We were like stuck in the same class. well sorta. And yes, i still do love her...because that love came from my 6th grade year in MS, well started from adore, like, really like, now im positive i do, i love her, really love. hey you cant blame me cuz its been 3 years and my heart hasnt change. and everytime she gets hurt, i wanna to like kill whoever got her hurt. But i wont do it cuz like idk, it might feel weird. but now, its a whole new story. i will help her no matter wat. If im willing to break 3 phones because of her, and lets her like borrow clothing of mine(jackets,etc) then i let her keep it and also if she wants money and i have money, i would lend it to her and then it turns into, "huh? what u mean u owe me? i never gave you money girl." This girl has gotten me thru alot of drama that if it wasnt for her, i would have like died due to bullying and racism. She supported me and thats all that matters. I do not mind if she reads this nor mind if she hates me or nevered loved me...because as long as she's happy, im happy and im willing to leave her sights and her life just so she can be happy. Yes, i do sound crazy, but i am willing to do it.
I just want to say i Love you girl...and i hope you have a successful life.

To: Cheryl

Haiku

Some Haiku's i made...

A stab in the heart
is a gun which will not shoot
the target it aims

Tai Chi is nature
it surrounds us like a sheild
protects from evil

There was this one chick
she is a flower blooming
that will never leave

Random Asian Boy Part 4

Many has said that he couldnt make it to High School. But guess what, he did. Thanks to all of his friends he was able to to make it into 9th grade. He probably wouldnt be a freshman right now. he would probably just drop out. But during his freshman year really nothing has happen that is interesting. but He really wants to thanks his friend for all they did and those who have been with him when he actually need someone to talk to. He has changed ALOT since when he was in elementary school. But if it werent his friends, he would still be shy and quiet. And that is why his friends mean everything to him, well only his best friends. Even his music taste changed alot. like he only like chinese music...but after hanging out with soooo many friends he now listens to every genre as long as he aint bored of it and doesnt care bout what language it is. Even though he has those thoughts about his EX, he still likes her...well loves her still...dont know whether its a good thing or bad since he had many bad thoughts about her... and also he always says that your brain and heart fights everyday to choose what you choose...but if it's love, then the heart always win. so he ignores his old thoughts...whether the results are bad or not, he will respect her and wishes her happiness. Yes, he has liked alot of girls...and still do. He is a freshman right now. Taking classes like an average freshman. This Random Asian Boy has a name of Warren Mingo Chan.

This is the end of the Random Asian Boy...i may continue this in my later life...idk yet
but please know that this is a true story

Click here to continue to Part 5

Random Asian Boy Part 3

This kid has made it to Middle school now. The middle school he went to was called, Williston.
He has been thinking whether or not he should consider being friends with people. Or even think about who my best friends would be. But after the first week of school. He met an awesome dude name, Chandler. and Thanks to him i met a awesome girl...who soon became my girlfriend. He was happy but was thinking, this must be a dream. There is no way he could get a girlfriend. But continue on...and he also was thinking during the same time, Why is she wanting our relationship secret...he just didnt get it... he even thought that she probably never liked him and just felt sorry for him. He never really understand her during the time of 6th grade. He was so lost. he didnt know if he should continue the relationship or not. But then he thought, maybe he was thinking to much.So he stop thinking retarded stuff and continue on with his life. So he continue with his classes. But during the same year of 6th grade. he felt like he didnt feel like she loved him anymore so he was like break it. so he went single again. He could have went into Algebra 1 in 7th grade but he was too lazy so he didnt...and took it in 8th. He has met some friends that he could trust but not all. He has made some best friends. He love them all. all of his best friends. He went back out with that same girl again and she wanted the relationship to be secret. and he never really understand that. But he continue anyway because he really loves her. Now during the Formal he was look like crap...he thinks he ugly(which was true) He hated his face, but he loved the suit because it was his father. He had fun and the music was awesome! hehe

click here to continue to Part 4

Random Asian Boy Part 2

So the kid has to move to a weird city called Wilmington. There was no one he knows. No familiar faces nor asians. So he started school called, College Park Elementary School. He started school and started a process all over again...making new friends. He met some cool friends in 3rd grade. Then moved somehow(he doesnt know why). He was transfer to another school called Snipes Elementary school. He met some assholes there and other retarded people. But he didnt like it there because he gets bullied every day. During that time he did took Shaolin Kung Fu. But he couldnt control his strength so he didnt punch the bullies because if he did, then he might end up killing them...and he doesnt want that. One thing he hates is trouble and killing em is trouble. so yea. He did cried once...but those tears werent sadness...it was anger, how i couldnt punch them. but i still survive alittle. Then he convince his parents to go back to College Park. He was so happy but that happiness didnt last long. The first day when he went back to College Park, he found out that his so called "best friends" were lying to him the whole time...using him as a answer sheet. he was soo freaking pissed. but he still couldnt do anything. He was called by many names. some may have been known as...Fat Albert, Jackie Chan(still being called but he is immune to it now cuz he isnt affected), Jet Li, Asian. he doesnt remember the rest.

click here to continue to Part 3

Random Asian Boy Part 1

There was a kid, born in Manhattan, New York, on July 31st, 1996. He was born around the time of i believe 22:35. He was an Asian-American. His dad work as a truck driver, delivering stuff to other shops or restaurants. He love his son! The kid was the first child and was loved dearly by his parents. but when he was like 2, he was forced to moved to Kingston, NC. He attended school there for like 3 years. And that was when he complained to his parents, "Im sooooo bored...i wish i have a younger sibling...a brother would be nice." and then his parents thought about it...okay...so they had sex one night when the kid went to sleep. And that is when the kid got a sister. He loved his sister really much. he was willing to play with her, feed her, help her, and even teach her stuff.

click here to continue to Part 2

Start Again-Sam Tsui

Baby, it breaks my heart that you don’t smile anymore
I’m dying to help you heal but you won’t unlock your door
You say it takes time, but you don’t have to spend it alone

You’re stuck in the memory that you desperately to rewind
You’re too busy looking back, won’t you make another try
Now your trust is gone, but you won’t find it again on your own

So don’t go telling me it’s too late to start
You’re still holding a broken heart
but if you let me in (let me in)
Baby, you can start again (start again)

And don’t go telling me there’s no second chance
You’ll understand when you take my hand
Baby let me in (let me in)
I promise we will start again (start again)

Trying to get to you so I make this promises
I swear they are breakable, but you still just hearing hiss
I won’t let you go ’til you decided you want to be free

You’re haunted by yesterday and still sore from the fall
All you need is to whitewash this old walls
Paint something new, if you let yourself listen to me

So don’t go telling me it’s too late to start
You’re still holding a broken heart
but if you let me in (let me in)
Baby, you can start again (start again)

And don’t go telling me there’s no second chance
You’ll understand when you take my hand
Baby, let me in (let me in)
I promise we will start again (start again)

Don’t give up yet, I won’t let you close the curtain too soon
We can reset, you can take the leap and let me show you
You just gotta make the choice.. yeah..

We love , we lose, and you think that the best defense is distance
You know, what now, put it on the mute so you can listen
But there’s a way out of here, just follow my voice

So don’t go telling me it’s too late to start
You’re still holding a broken heart
but if you let me in
yeah….

So don’t go telling me it’s too late to start
You’re still holding a broken heart (a broken heart)
but if you let me in (let me in)
Baby, you can start again (Baby, you can start again)

And don’t go telling me there’s no second chance (you’ll understand)
You’ll understand when you take my hand (take my hand)
Baby, let me in (let me in)
I promise we will start again (I promise we will start again)

So don’t go telling me it’s too late to start
You’re still holding a broken heart
but if you let me in (let me in)
Baby, you can start again

I Just Wanna Run-Downtown Fiction

I just wanna run, hide it away
Run because they're chasing me down
I just wanna run, throw it away
Run before they're finding me out
I just wanna run

I just wanna run
I'm out here all alone
I try to call your house
Can't reach you on the phone
I'll gather up the nerve
I'm packing up my bag
It's more than you deserve
Don't treat me like a drag

I'm feelin' like I keep on talking
I'm repeating
Myself, my words lost all meaning
I keep talking
I repeat myself___

I just wanna run, hide it away
Run because they're chasing me down
I just wanna run, throw it away
Run before they're finding me out
I just wanna run (run, run, run)
I just wanna run (run, run, run)

Like a game of chess
I predict your move
I think I know you better
Better than you do
I'm sick of feeling cheap
Cheated and abused
Sick of losing sleep
Thinking about you

I'm feelin' like I keep on talking
I'm repeating
Myself, my words lost all meaning
I keep talking
I repeat myself___

I just wanna run, hide it away
Run because they're chasing me down
I just wanna run, throw it away
Run before they're finding me out
I just wanna run (run, run, run)
I just wanna run (run, run, run)

I just made a new Voki. See it here:

Friend ship poem

You are friendly, kind and caring
Sensitive, loyal and understanding
Humorous, fun, secure and true
Always there... yes that's you.

Special, accepting, exciting and wise
Truthful and helpful, with honest blue eyes
Confiding, forgiving, cheerful and bright
Yes that's you... not one bit of spite.

You're one of a kind, different from others
Generous, charming, but not one that smothers
Optimistic, thoughtful, happy and game
But not just another... in the long chain.

Appreciative, warm and precious like gold
Our friendship won't tarnish or ever grow old
You'll always be there, I know that is true
I'll always be here... always for you.

Written and owned by Angela Lee Hillsley

Space Bound

(Verse 1)

We touch, I feel a rush, we clutch, it isn't much

But it's enough to make me wonder what's in store for us

It's lust, it's torturous, you must be a sorcerous

Cause you just, did the impossible, gained my trust

Don't play games it'll be dangerous if you fuck me over

Cause if I get burnt, I'ma show ya what it's like to hurt

Cause I've been treated like dirt befo' ya

And love is "evol", spell it backwards, I'll show ya

Nobody knows me, I'm cold, walk down this road all alone

It's no one's fault but my own, it's the path I've chosen to go

Frozen as snow, I show no emotion what'so ever, so

Don't ask me why I have no love for these mo'fuckin' hoes

Blood-suckin' succubuses, what the fuck is up with this?

I've tried in this department, but, I ain't had no luck with this

It sucks but it's exactly what I thought it would be like tryin' to start over

I've got a hole in my heart from some kind of emotional roller-coasta';

Somethin' I won't go on till you toy with my emotions, so it's over

It's like an explosion every time I hold ya, wasn't jokin' when I told ya

You take my breath away, you're a supernova

And I'm a...

(Chorus)

I'm a space-bound rocketship and your heart's the moon

And I'm aimin' right at you

Right at you

250, 000 miles on a clear night in June

And I'm aimin' right at you

Right at you

Right at you

(Verse 2)

I'll do whatever it takes, when I'm with you, I get the shakes

My body aches when I ain't with you, I have zero strength

There's no limit on how far I would go, no boundaries, no lengths

Why do we say that until we get that person that we think's

Gonna be that one and then once we get 'em, it's never the same

You want 'em when they don't want you, soon as they do, feelin's change

It's not a contest and I ain't on no conquest for no mate

I wasn't lookin' when I stumbled onto you, musta been fate

But so much is at stake, what the fuck does it take, let's cut to the chase

'Fore the door shuts in your face, promise me if I cave in and break

And leave myself open that I won't be makin' a mistake

Cause I'm a

(Chorus)

I'm a space-bound rocketship and your heart's the moon

And I'm aimin' right at you

Right at you

250, 000 miles on a clear night in June

And I'm aimin' right at you

Right at you

Right at you

(Verse 3)

So after a year and 6 months, it's no longer me that you want

But I love you so much it hurts, never mistreated you once

I poured my heart out to you, let down my guard, swear to God

I'll blow my brains in your lap, lay here and die in your arms

Drop to my knees and I'm pleadin', I'm tryin' to stop you from leavin'

You won't even listen, so fuck it, I'm tryin' to stop you from breathin'

I put both hands on your throat, I sit on top of you, squeezin'

Til' I snap your neck like a Popsicle stick, ain't a possible reason

I can think of to let you walk up out this house and let you live

Tears stream down both of my cheeks, then I let you go and just give

And before I put that gun to my temple, I told you this

(Bridge)

And I would've did anything for you

To show you how much I adored you

But it's over now, it's too late to save our

Love

Just promise me you'll think of me

Every time you look up in the sky and see a star

Cuz I'm a

(Chorus)

I'm a space-bound rocketship and your heart's the moon

And I'm aimin' right at you

Right at you

250, 000 miles and a clear night in June

And I'm so lost without you

Without you

Without you

I gotta stop putting my WHOLE heart in one relationship i always get burnt.

Am I alone?

I get a funny feeling,
it comes from deep inside.
I get all mad and angry,
wanting to go and hide.

My doctor calls it depression,
my dad says it's just me.
But the thoughts and feelings,
no one will ever be able to see.

Some say I'm psycho,
some say I'm just weird.
It's like I'm a different person,
and the old me just disappeared.

I get really edgy,
I want to commit suicide real bad.
Then I get a headache,
followed by feeling sad.

I wish I could get help,
I wish it would go away.
Maybe if I keep praying real hard,
it will some day.

Some people may have wondered why the rat (year of the rat)

There may be some who've wondered why the rat
Happens to be first to have a year
Exclusively devoted to his name.
Yet clever, crafty creatures never fear:
Eventually they'll win -- that's where they're at!
And this is how it came about: The rat,
Racing for the prize, fell towards the rear.
Out of breath, he thought he'd lost the game.
Fast rampaging Bull was drawing near;
The problem was: How to reach his back?
Here came by the lost, high-leaping cat.
Eureka! Up they went, the two friends dear,
Riding on the bull's back towards fame.
At the last, Rat pushes Pussy clear,
Then leaps ahead of Bull -- and that was that!

Dont say I love you

Never say “I love you”
If you don’t really care
Never talk about feelins
If they arent really there
Never hold her hand
If your gonna break her heart
Never look into her eyes
If all you do is lie
Never say hi if you really mean goodbye
If you really mean forever
Then say you will try
Never say forever
Cause forever sometimes makes her cry

Mixed up thoughts

Shooting stars,
Painful scars

Distant voices,
And bitter choices.

I watched my life pass by when I tell her goodbye,
Stupid me made her apart of my time.

If you love something set it free,
And if it comes back it’s meant to be,
Is what she told me,
Funny how sometimes I just don’t believe her stories.

Moving on,
Now there’s some one new,
Sometimes I feel she just won’t due.

She wants me to call,
Yet she’s so distant,
She says she’s tired,
I just think she’d rather watch the District.

I just don’t believe theirs anyone for me,
I have spent most of my time alone you see,
I seem to loose my identity so easily,
I always ask what the fuck is wrong with me?


What am I going to do,
Other then waste all my time with you.
If I lost my site,
My future wouldn’t feel very bright.

But this is all beside the point,
Oh wait there never was one,
These are just some mixed up thoughts,
Just some mixed up thoughts from me,
But who gives a dam
Aww there it is,
That’s my point beneath this rhyme,
Now I'll carry on with my time.

Judged

I’m writing this in frustration,
Can’t you feel my pain,
Do you feel like it’s your job to make my life miserable every fucking day?

And the answer is yes im hurting deep with in,
Its not just because of you.
Can you see all the scares in my writing.?

And no you couldn’t get a better picture of me if you met me first hand,
Because all that I am is in this ink,
This ink is all I can ever be.

And im not going to care what you think of this rhyme,
because honestly it has nothing to do with you.
I don’t think it came from your mind.

All you do is read it and judge it ,
Regardless of the point,
You bitch and moan about the grammar
and that the lines aren’t in place all the time.
Yes I know your right!!!
But this isn’t your rhyme..am I not right?
Go get your own ,
And ill let you know what I think ,
The same way you did to me.

I don’t mind your criticism ,
I welcome it most times.
Just this once could you ignore my punctuation.
Don’t worry about the spelling,
Just read what’s its about,
and what im trying to say this time.

But its not going to matter to me,
If you only give me one star this time,
and write me a nasty line,
I’m not going to give a fuck one bit, it served its purpose,
Did you get what I meant?